Marriage is stuffed with highs, lows and a complete bunch of atypical moments in between.
One way or the other the spouses of Twitter proceed to seek out humor within the trivia of married life ― and sum it up completely in not more than 280 characters.
Each different week, we spherical up the funniest marriage tweets of the earlier 14 days. Learn on for 21 new relatable ones that can have you ever laughing in settlement.
I took my hair out of the messy bun and made it a much less messy bun and my husband requested if I used to be going someplace.
— Felicia (@LostFelicia) March 6, 2023
My spouse handed me a clear towel and instructed me to “put it as an alternative.” So, I checked out it and mentioned, “Don’t overlook that you simply’re solely a towel,” and I used to be reminded but once more of simply how fortunate this lady was to be married to me.
— Uncle Duke (@UncleDuke1969) March 7, 2023
Was loudly singing "My Cats!" to the tune of "My Woman" proper when my husband answered an essential cellphone name so the morning goes nice up to now.
— Benjamin Siemon (@BenjaminJS) March 3, 2023
made the error of providing an answer to the issue that my spouse spent 20 minutes describing in nice element
— 🌜🤷♂️Dad Moon Rising 🤷♂️🌛 (@raoulvilla) March 10, 2023
I might be in the lounge and I am going to nonetheless be in my spouse's approach within the kitchen.
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) March 12, 2023
The factor about being married for a very long time is that regardless of seeing one another every single day you may nonetheless shock your partner by the haircut you bought 4 days in the past.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) March 3, 2023
Attempt to not be jealous however I get the home to myself each evening whereas my husband is on the bathroom
— I Disguise From My Children (@IHideFromMyKids) March 2, 2023
My spouse has no intention of ever sharing her blanket and but each morning she asks me to assist her unfold it over your entire mattress
— Vinod Chhaproo (@Chhapiness) March 5, 2023
Husband: *walks within the door*
— Unfiltered Mama 💗✌️ (@UnfilteredMama) January 28, 2023
Me: DID YOU WATCH ALL THE INSTAGRAMS I SENT YOU TODAY ABOUT OUR MARRIAGE?
Regardless of how unhealthy issues get world wide, it will possibly by no means break the enjoyment I get from placing my chilly arms on my spouse’s again
— Joel Jeffrey (@joeljeffrey) March 13, 2023
Earlier than I obtained married, I by no means knew there was proper and improper approach to take the trash out.
— The Unknown Misfit (@TheSpotter8) February 28, 2023
My husband took the canine to the canine park tonight so I requested him for his or her report playing cards after they returned. He shook his head in disappointment and whispered "not their finest work. They did not make any buddies. Additionally, they may be imply ladies."
— Eli McCann (@EliMcCann) March 1, 2023
[Husband calls to tell me there’s a tornado warning]
— DonutHawk (@StruggleDisplay) February 28, 2023
Me: [overwhelmed by our filthy house] Oh thank god
Stole my husband's pc and proceeded to Like ALL of the statuses in his FB newsfeed.
— Lil Bit 🌈 (@LizerReal) February 28, 2023
He obtained snippy at me for "liking issues he did not like". 😂 I've no regrets.
Generally I'm wondering what my husband does with on a regular basis he saves by setting his recycling on the counter as an alternative of under it within the bin.
— One Awkward Mother (@oneawkwardmom) February 28, 2023
My spouse has been out of city for per week and I’m heating up a frozen pizza at 11:30am after selecting up my automotive from a good friend’s home the place it had been for 2 days following an unanticipated bender so I’d say I’m actually successful at this entire bachelor factor
— Sarah Rebecca Kessler (@moveablejaw) February 28, 2023
you may't scare me, you are not my spouse beginning a dialog by saying "simply so ..."
— 🌜🤷♂️Dad Moon Rising 🤷♂️🌛 (@raoulvilla) March 3, 2023
My spouse: Once you see the flowers like this may you water them?
— Eman El-husseini (@emanifique) March 1, 2023
Me: I have been which means to.
Spouse: and what occurred?
Me: You recognize I used to be sitting proper right here gazing them and repeating in my head water the flowers, who's going to water the flowers? ME
Then I obtained up and forgot.
which one in every of you instructed my husband in regards to the track mom. he JUST stopped singing "angela bassett did the factor"
— broti gupta (@BrotiGupta) March 7, 2023
one of many perks of marriage is having somebody to level out you will have an additional lengthy chin hair
— Tracie Breaux (@traciebreaux) March 13, 2023
My husband spent an hour at Dwelling Depot yesterday and I spent an hour looking for my husband in Dwelling Depot yesterday.
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) March 10, 2023
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